My Turn: (Adrienne's Side)

Since our last newsletter, I feel as if I have been slapped to the ground and picked back up again.

Let me explain…

In our last newsletter, I wrote the cute and catchy line “Some Pray. Some Give. Some Go.” This statement is true, but it is not complete. Thanks to Sarah and Casey, we’ve been introduced to some “new reads”. I’ve learned that some give moral support, some listen, some ask questions, some help with the details, some communicate while you are over-seas, some help when you return, some send diapers for your child…..oh! Here’s a good one- Some proof-read your communications and tell you when you make a HUGE error, like forgetting to put a line for people to write their NAMES on your response cards. Definitely don’t know who wants to do what! We can laugh about it now, but it has been a rough couple of months!

Once I grasped this concept, I began to get excited again. Then, not-so-much again. Then, excited again. You can see where this is going!

Caleb perceived this as me “not being sure of my call”. In retrospect, that is what I was saying, but it is not what I meant. Every bone in me knows that one day we will be serving as missionaries. I have felt rushed by my husband and uncomfortable at times about the timing of it all. But, like Caleb said, we both started talking with Stephen Ministers. (Let me just take a moment to give a “Shout Out” to mine. She is wonderful!)

I began to see that the call was clear, but that life was HARD. My day is currently filled with being a wife, being a mom, being a friend, being a daughter, working full-time during the middle of tax season, keeping a budget, paying off debt, trying to lose weight, keeping the house clean since it’s on the market, ya-da ya-da ya-da….

I’m not looking for a pity party, because I know that as women, we tend to fill our time with so many things whether we work full-time or not. But, I am trying to make a point. Next on that list, I WANTED to place Me….as in “Me-Time”…..a chance to breath, a chance to cry, a chance to watch Grey’s Anatomy or eat Peanut Butter cookies if I wanted. But, I felt guilty about this. I felt that next on that very long list HAD TO BE working towards going over-seas.

My Stephen Minister put it this way- As women, we tend to walk through life as empty juice boxes. We give and give and give and squeeze out every ounce of energy for others until there is nothing left for us.

I’ve decided to stop doing that. Caleb and I have had many long talks about all of this. I’m really excited about PNG, but then I get caught up in everything else the next day. It’s a vicious cycle and it has been very hard and “taxing” (thought that word was appropriate given my profession) on our family. So, here are my prayer requests:

1) To find a way where I can stay home with Ben and not work full-time.
2) For the house to sell or a long-term renter to pop into the picture.
3) For my migraines to subside.
4) For a core support team. People that will support me like my Stephen Minister- “guilt-free” relationships.
5) For an encouraging EQUIP Training. For a renewed relationship with “The Organization”.